Senseless Sunday Sarcasm : Work Etiquette

Work etiquette has always been a problem for me. 

To be kind about it, I can be salty.

Why do people cry and run away when I say, “Your writing sucks!”  Why do people have a problem with emails that spell out the problems clearly?   

I clearly have my priorities

When you’re working, do you want to read two paragraphs of sweet nothings or have someone write, “I noticed on paragraph 3 of your letter that  you are not going to be offering a new service, however in paragraph 2 you stated that you are going to be offering a new service.  Which is it?”

There’s always some clown who writes, “Not Now.”  You’d think they’d appreciate having something that embarrassing corrected.  

This is what they’ll look like when the 700th person tells them the same thing

There are the people who don’t like my email writing style, and then there are the people who don’t like how I sit:

My sitting technique looks more like this:

If I looked like her, no one would care how I was sitting.

And if you’re wearing pants, why should it matter?

Unfortunately, I’ve never blended in well at work, though some people are excellent at doing so

When it comes to office mistakes, I don’t have the personality to pull this one off

Unfortunately, most people think of me this way

And for some people, especially the slackers, they look at my existence as an unfortunate mistake

When I make a mistake, I don’t just box myself into a corner

I bottle it up outside me.

Yes, I can be nice

But most of the time, I’m just plain catty.