The Coon Cat speaks
CAT: Put the camera down and help me out. I want you to pull this tick off my butt.
HUMAN: Wait while I fetch the gauntlets.
CAT: Do you take me for a wussy?
HUMAN: No. I had a tick on a hemorrhoid once, and it wasn’t pretty. The damned thing kept digging in further. Had I claws at the time, I would’ve reamed myself a new one trying to get it off.
CAT: Well, are you going to get the thick-ass gloves or continue talking at me while I die from blood loss?
HUMAN: Just what I needed today, a ticked off cat with a burr up his ass.